Boot Camp, or, "Why Do the Bad Guys Always Have the Sexiest Uniforms?"


"Where are they?" Leorio glanced at his watch - was it broken? It still had the same display he'd seen the last time he'd looked at it. Twenty minutes later than it should be, assuming his friends could be trusted to arrive on time.

"Late, it seems," Kurapika supplied unhelpfully, and sipped his coffee, unconcerned. Which was just as aggravating as Killua and Gon, who were late meeting them for some unknown reason, and while Leorio didn't really mind being alone with Kurapika - irritating attitude notwithstanding - at a romantic outdoor café overlooking a fairly decent beach scene…

People should be on time, damnit!

"Thanks, hadn't noticed," he snarked back, and slouched against the seat, one elbow strung over a corner of its back, sighing impatiently. "How can they expect us to wait like this, anyway? This is pushing it just a bit, don't you think?"

Kurapika set down his coffee, and eyed him pointedly - although without any real harshness. "Your constant complaints are more of a nuisance than the wait, Leorio."

That was it. Leorio opened his mouth to give some kind of insulting response -

"Oi!" Killua's voice cut through the light babble around them - followed by Killua himself, making his way around the other tables with Gon on his heels. "Sorry we're late," he added with no trace of real apology, when they'd made it to their destination and pulled up a couple of chairs.

"Yup, sorry!" Gon sounded a little more sincere - but the huge goofy grin on his face didn't seem to speak the same story as his voice. His clothing - strange-looking clothing, actually - was distinctly rumpled, and both his and Killua's hair was mussed. "We got distracted for a bit."

"Yeah, I'll bet," Leorio griped, still feeling irritable - but dutifully moved over so both chairs would fit at the tiny table. It closed a good portion of the distance between himself and Kurapika, which softened his annoyance some. "What were you two doing that took so long, anyway?"

Not that he probably couldn't guess

"And does it explain the military uniforms?" Kurapika added without inflection, raising an eyebrow at the shamelessly grinning pair next to them.

"Mm, well, sort of." Gon shrugged his shoulders once, carelessly, and Killua nodded next to him, his expression somehow reminiscent of a cat that had gotten its paws on a good supply of cream. Innuendo not intended. "We were visiting a costume store - "

" - and Gon was thinking we had to get something, because it was all so interesting, or whatever," Killua interjected, leaning forward a bit in his seat.

" - and Killua found the uniforms near the back, and they had our size, so we thought it'd be fun," Gon finished up, and shrugged again, still beaming. "It was fun."

"Tons of fun," Killua agreed, and leaned sideways in his chair so that he could rest his face on his hand and study Gon with a smile that was part smug, part satisfied, and part trouble. Still.

"Too much fun," Leorio grumbled, and scowled across the table at the both of them. "Didn't it cross your mind during all this fun that maybe there were people waiting for you?"

Kurapika lowered his face to his coffee with a sigh. "If it had, I'd wonder about them," he said before either of the guilty party could answer, and eyed Leorio with no small exasperation. "Let it go. We have the whole week, and you're only wasting more time when you complain about a half hour. Not to mention," he added, pointedly, "that it's very annoying."

Leorio slouched in his seat, glowering back sullenly. "Pot calling kettle," he muttered.

Kurapika ignored him, sipping his coffee with a certain dignified calm.

"Well!" Gon suddenly pushed his chair away from the table, giving them that look of wide-eyed innocence that he pulled out when the occasion demanded. "I have to go to the bathroom." He hopped to his feet and moved around the chair, looking back over his shoulder with what was probably a calculated amount of casual charm before hurrying on his way. "Be right back!"

Leorio stared after him. "Oi, already…?"

Killua was staring too, but in a different sort of way. "Me too," he declared abruptly, and was out of his seat and off after his best friend without so much as a backwards glance.

"You haven't even ordered yet…" Leorio let that trail off, resignation setting in. Trying to change Gon's mind was like standing on a beach and yelling at the tide to stop coming in, and telling Killua what to do was something only Gon could safely get away with. "Those two were easier to talk to before they hit puberty," he grumbled sourly, snatching up his lukewarm coffee to take a disgruntled guzzle.

"I wonder where they got those costumes…" Kurapika's voice was thoughtful. Leorio lowered his mug for a look, and saw an expression to match, blue eyes still following the now-vanished figures of their two younger friends. "Which store, I mean. They're quite well made."

"Just some costume store, probably." Something about the conversation was making him more alert now; he watched Kurapika carefully for signs of danger or… something. "What does it matter?"

"We should ask when they get back," Kurapika said with deceptive mildness, and the corners of his mouth edged up a bit as he turned that gaze sideways to meet Leorio's. "They may have a doctor's uniform - or two. Hm?"

That successfully dispelled the remainder of Leorio's bad mood.


The End